LIVity

Originally published on Tumblr November 4, 2011:

I fell asleep this morning and found myself caught in the cylindrical web America has spun; for one brief moment, joining the military made sense to me. And then I woke up.

I was really surprised at myself because this unfortunate event happened right after I heard that Republicans blocked the Rebuild America Jobs Act. Apparently, avoiding a slight – 0.7 percent – tax increase for the wealthiest Americans, less than 1 percent of the population, is more beneficial than creating hundreds of thousands of jobs for everyday joes.

Like really, things are ridiculous. Recently, I was looking at a federal government position that required a PhD, but was set at GS-11, meaning starting pay is a little over 50K. I don’t have a PhD, but I was offended on two levels: 1) the lack of regard this agency gave to the amount of student loans an individual accrues to obtain a PhD (and definitely can’t afford to repay on a GS-11 salary) 2) the fact that our market is to the point where people need to have a PhD to even start to think about living comfortably.

…that our market is to the point where I would think about joining the military.

This thought stemmed from a conversation I was having with my co-workers yesterday. One, who we’ll refer to as TG, is military, the other, who we’ll refer to as D, is a civilian and is also in the market for a new job. TG stated that D should be able to find a job in no time in this area. Maybe TG was just being nice, but I also think it may have come from military being unaware of how frustrating civilian job searches can be.

At this point, I started envying the fact that although some may apply for jobs within their branch, for the most part, military are assigned tours of duty and don’t have to search for jobs. In any case, there’s guaranteed pay for service regardless of tour.

Then I thought about the flip side – falling into the trap of letting a job market that’s designed to be less than stellar, convince me to fight a war that’s not mine. A war that’s occurred because someone finally stood up to the wealthy, American bully and decided they weren’t going to line our 1 percent’s pockets with its lunch money any longer.

Our elected officials are financially taken care of and think nothing of utilizing a high school mentality when confronting these issues. They show no remorse at giving a utilitarian approach no consideration, even when nobody would be negatively impacted (meaning 0.7 percent increase of taxes won’t break a millionaire), for the simple fact that it would support a rival clique… my bad, rival party. Unfortunately, this simple-minded allowance comes at the expense of the majority and often manipulates us into getting sucked further into their childish games.

I wish I could offer a solution, but all I can say is, stay woke, my friends.

This article gave me a headache, but please read it if you get the chance:

Two years after BP oil spill, executive compensation still flowing

I've been harping about the injustice of oil prices for years now. At first my gripe was simply that as a full-time graduate student working as a waitress, I could barely afford to commute to school and work. As a working adult, gas prices are still putting a strain on me (mainly because the price of everything has drastically increased and it's blamed on the price of fuel), but it's so much bigger than that. Now, to add to the fact that I'm pissed off about being robbed blind, I'm also pissed that my intelligence is being insulted.

Just last week I read an article promoting the idea that fuel prices are rising because of what's going on in the Middle East. This reasoning is nothing new and frankly I'm tired of hearing it. Especially when every year I have to read articles about how large the oil companies' margin of profit is. And now, how BP's CEO Bob Dudley's pay package of $6.8 million in salary, annual bonus awards, stock grants and options is small in comparison to the packages other oil companies' CEOs receive. And how Tony Hayward, BP's CEO in 2010 during the infamous Gulf Coast Oil Spill, was paid out $1.1 million last month and $194,973 the year after the spill.

And the only thing BP has to say when questioned why these guys are still making the big bucks after exhibiting poor performance is, they're trying to offer competitive pay??

“We recognize a concern by government, and society at large, of excess in this area, but cannot ignore the reality of a global competitive market for top executive talent,” Antony Burgmans, a BP director and chairman of the remuneration committee, wrote in the company’s annual report. “We respect investors’ expectation for pay to be strongly tied to performance while also wanting to ensure that executives receive fair reward for their achievements.”

If BP wants its executives to be fairly compensated based on their achievements, it should really be collecting money from them. The Gulf Coast Oil Spill was a major, somebody give me a word for "opposite of achievement," and everybody seems like they've forgotten about the smaller, spills BP has had since then - more anti-achievements.

I'm sorry, but if members of middle-class America demonstrated this level of performance, they probably wouldn't keep their jobs. They certainly wouldn't be paid more just to ensure everybody's salary is competetive. But not only is the middle class living by a different set of standards, it is also being hit left and right for money to fatten the pockets of just about everybody who runs with the oil clique. And on top of it all, it's constantly being lied to.

Okay, I have to get off this soapbox and go take something for my head...

During my hiatus from Blogger, I was on Tumblr, but that forum didn’t work well for my purposes. Because I’d like to compile my online writing in one spot, I’m going to republish some of those pieces here. I originally published this one on November 10, 2011:

Ladies, we need to talk about hair because a lot of you are driving yourselves insane over it. And men, I’m inviting you to the conversation because some of you are a major contributing factor to the loss of sanity.

I’ve been very fortunate to be surrounded by men who stay in their lane as far as the topic of my hair goes - they’ll talk about it if I bring it up, tell me it looks nice if it does and if it doesn’t, they say nothing. This is as it should be.


But, I’ve also had a few men who mistakenly think they’re in my circle and can comment on my hair. From these few run ins, I understand why women who allow this sort of energy around them are confused. (A very solid argument can be made that women who are pressured to react based on another’s issues with self image need to change their thinking, but I’ll leave that for another discussion.)

I wore my hair natural for much of my 20s until I decided I wanted a bob and relaxed it. I found the variation of men’s interactions with me to be, well, confused. When I would wear my hair relaxed, I’d have men come up and thank me for not having weave, very few men would approach me when my hair was natural and when I’d wear a headwrap, I’d have men come up and ask me if my hair was long. To me, this says some men are more willing to approach a woman based on fantasy than truth - we’re brown and we have our own texture of hair that most likely is not straight and/or long.

It’s still beautiful though. It’s said hair is a woman’s crowning beauty, there’s nothing in there about what texture the hair has to be. Until more people start accepting that, including our own people, women are going to keep relaxing their hair until it all breaks off or gluing/sewing/weaving somebody else’s hair in their head until all their own hair breaks off or wearing wigs and neglecting their own hair until it breaks off…sensing a theme here?? This makes as much sense as shaving your eyebrows off and creating new ones with eyebrow pencil.

I’m not advocating wearing your hair natural or relaxed or braided or whatever. All I’m saying is appreciate what you have and make your style decisions based on style, not somebody else’s perception of beauty.

This weekend I learned there's two things a majority of people should not do - have smartphones and later down the line, have children.

Let me explain the correlation. I was sitting in a bar this weekend and got into a conversation with a seemingly intelligent man. He did seem overly eager to settle down, but because we had similar interests, I agreed to exchange information.

And now I'm depressed.

We exchanged approximately four text messages before he replied to my text asking how he was doing with an unsolicited photo of himself in a pool. The photo's caption stated he was fine and that he was sitting at home writing. I'm still trying to figure out what the photo had to do with what I asked him and with what he was actually doing at the time he sent the reply.

More importantly, I'm trying to figure out why he would think it's acceptable to send it. Call me old fashioned but I thought photos were reserved for people you have a connection with or at least someone who requested one, not just the person you met in a bar the nyte before. Has our culture become so superficial the attractiveness of a potential mate now outweighs all?

This encounter was almost discouraging enough to make me start batting for the other team. But then I thought, for him to do that and think nothing of it means there's a large group of women who also think this is okay and are probably even responding in turn.

And to make it all worse, these people get together, procreate and teach their children these whack ideals. Seems the only hope to ending this cycle is for evolution to kick in and eliminate all the pretty, but clueless people.

Okay, so I know that young adults are not widely respected by our older counterparts. We're accused of playing our music too loud, driving too fast and having no ambitions except to play PS2 and stay on the Internet blogging and downloading music for our iPods. As a 24-year-old recent graduate, I have to vent. I have to let it be known that it is not easy being young. First and foremost, I can't get a job. We graduate high school and go to college because everybody's telling us it'll be easier to get a job and we'll make more money. We graduate college and go to grad school because we still can't get a job but with a Master's it'll be easier to get a job and we'll make more money. So now what?? Not enough experience. Maybe, it has to do with the fact that I've been busy going to school for the past 20 years. And, why do I need experience to get experience (Common on a similiar topic: "Why do I need ID to get ID?" -The Questions) Nobody's willing to train anybody nowadays. How am I supposed to get a job when all the jobs ask for 10 years experience? Right, so I should have started on my career path at the tender age of 14. Guess I'm just a late bloomer. This is wild. Okay, so as a result I don't have health insurance. Don't get me started on this one. But yet, there are endless polls and articles about how a new trend is emerging of young adults not having insurance. Even if I had a job, I'd probably have to wait 6 months for my insurance to kick in. What else?? Oh yeah, no job=no money. You guys can help me here. I'm trying to take preventative measures, meaning avoiding anything that may cause unexpected expenses. Please, stop throwing trash out your car windows, especially anything that can puncture my tires. When I get pulled over for doing the young adult thing AKA speeding I don't want to have to pay a speeding ticket AND have to buy at least three new tires because mine now have leaks in them. No, but for real, the amount of broken glass on the Beltway's shoulders is ridiculous. Also, no money means that I'm still part of the group of young adults who still live with their parents (because we can't afford to move out) that you read about in Newsweek. It's apparantly the newest trend *whomp whomp* And one more thing, no money means I can't afford to pay back the million and one dollars and fifty cents that I owe Sallie Mae for my BA and Master's that were supposed to get me a job that would allow me to pay for my BA and Master's. And really, it's not helping that the administration decided to raise student loan interest rates to like 9% What's really going on?? Between paying almost $4 for a gallon of gas to put in my car, to drive me to the Metro where I'll pay $10 to park my car and commute to my "job" that doesn't pay me but is giving me experience that's not quite enough to get a paying job, I was barely able to make it to the polls yesterday to vote some people into the government who may sympathize with my plight and help me. Really, I just need minimum wage raised. Maybe, I can get a job at McDonald's. But you know what's ironic, when I applied for a part time position at Claire's I apparently had too much experience. You can't win for losing, huh?? But you know what's even worse than all of this?? And maybe somebody can answer this question for me, they select prospective jurors from the list of registered voters, right?? I've been summoned three times...in the past year. The last time being today, the day after I voted. I'm thinking I may be tired of doing the right thing.

"I want to be free to live, able to have what I need to live" - Dead Prez 'Police State'

I was listening to Russ Parr's morning radio show this morning and happened to tune into an interesting interview. U.S. Marine's Sgt. Jason L. Thomas was recounting his experiences at Ground Zero on that fateful day five years ago. Although the American public has not heard much about this brave, black man, he is a hero. His story was told in "World Trade Center," the movie that was recently released. The catch is, his character was cast as a white man. I'm torn by this little-known fact just as Parr and his morning crew were. They were emphasizing the fact that Sgt. Thomas' ethnicity should have been a well known fact because the movie was created by one of the victim's he rescued. They also were concerned with the fact that this movie may become the official "transcript" of what happened and it should be correct in every way. Sgt. Thomas was being very patriotic and kept asserting that this was a travisty for all of America and he thinks the movie should still be seen. I applaud Sgt. Thomas for his humility but urge him to recognize that this is bigger than him. This goes back to the thinking that victors get the final say on what gets recorded in history. Unfortunately, we're all American and supposed to be standing united. Why, even in a time a tragedy, are we letting something like race divide us? When those planes hit the World Trade Center towers and the Pentagon, they didn't discriminate. So, I guess we have another incident of depriving our children of their history. We can add Sgt. Thomas' name to those like Garrett A. Morgan and other important African Americans who are never recognized but whose contributions to this country were life-changing.

I know I've been inconsistent with my postings as of recently and I don't have any breaking news today - "just some thoughts" as usual. I was reading the paper about a week ago and ran across an interesting article. Somebody polled people in countries such as Russia and Egypt to find out what they thought about America's occupation and attempt to democratize other countries. An overwhelming majority of polled countries think that America is doing more harm than good. All I have to say is, Bush is president over the United States of America, not the world. Who is he to decide how the government should be run in another country??

Food for thought. If individuals who are not part of the mainstream (by mainstream I mean majority) adopt mainstream standards but individuals who are part of the mainstream find beauty in ethnicity doesn't that leave the non-mainstreamers right where they started?? It's time to find beauty within ourselves and stop looking to others for confirmation.

Mardi Gras. I must admit, I wasn't expecting it to happen this year. I have mixed feelings about it not being canceled. I understand that it is probably one of the biggest sources of income for the city. And why not make money to rebuild the city while having a good time?? All the festivities could bring a breath of fresh air after the tragedy that happened in New Orleans this year--a sense of normalcy. On the flip side, there are people, who don't live in the French Quarter, who are still waiting for their homes to be rebuilt or repaired. They can't share in the sense of normalcy that is Mardi Gras. I have to wonder if the money that was supposed to be used to help these people is instead being used to fund Mardi Gras. It is a good investment if it will yield profit BUT is it fair to ask people to wait any longer to return home just because their homes aren't in the French Quarter?? That's like saying, "They've waited this long, it won't kill them to wait a little longer." It's not right. Especially when the government is spending more money to rebuild cities overseas (it wouldn't have to rebuild them if it hadn't destroyed them) than it is spending on rebuilding a city within its own borders. I guess it's relying on taxpayers to pick up its slack. Nothing unusual there.

Okay, so since it's been a while since I written, I have two unrelated topics to talk about. The first is about the terrorist plot to use shoe bombs to high-jack an airplane and fly it into a library tower in Los Angeles. I'm very skeptical about this one. I mean shoe bombs?? A library tower?? Come on. It seems like a fabricated story created to show the American people that all the money being sucked out of our pockets is being put to good use. National Security thwarted a plan involving shoe bombs, we can't be mad about that right?? They've more than made up for what they didn't do on 9/11. "It's the things that make you go hmmmm" Secondly, what's with the latest budget cuts?? $39 Billion cut from Medicaid, Medicare, and student loan subsidies. Who is that going to affect?? Apparently these programs are the cause of the $1.3 trillion deficit that we'll be facing by 2010--The Express reported that the cuts are "an important first step to restoring discipline on spending." How much do you think America spends per day on "the war??" Once again, this is a case of the people who need a break being punished for things they have no control over.

"My people steady losing while the rich keep winning" -The Roots Why (What's Going On)

I've been thinking, we need to give our parents' generation much more credit. For instance, the frustration we feel when trying to explain something like Instant Messaging and they don't grasp the concept...yeah, we need to get over it. Think about it, we grew up with computers, pagers, etc. When our parents were growing up, maybe one person in the neighborhood could afford a TV...and it was black and white. How well do you think you could grasp every new piece of technology when it's progressing that quickly?? I think they're remarkable because they're the bridge between simpler times and now.

Most Americans are under the impression that education will greatly improve their standard of living. I am not sure if this is true anymore. When Hurricane Katrina struck, a lot of people thought race was the determining factor in how quickly affected residents received aid. I think people have to be extremely careful when using the race card; 95 percent of the time, it is used incorrectly. I've said it before and I'll say it again, socioeconomics was the determining factor during this disaster and in most decisions made by people in power. Americans might as well be living in a caste system. Think about it. In the past, higher education meant a career and a lush lifestyle. At the same time, only the well off could afford to send their children to college. In modern times, scholarships, loans, etc. allow for most anybody to attend institutions of higher learning. All of a sudden, an undergrad degree has lost its value because a lacking job market is offering only jobs that graduates may have gotten before receiving their degrees. As a result, people who really couldn't afford college to begin with are stuck repaying loans for 15 years while earning an average salary. I'm not saying that education is bad or that your status will in no way improve, I'm just saying that it probably won't give you elite status. So, the rich remain in the top percentile because there aren't any newcomers and the rest of us continue with our daily grind. And to top it off, we're pitted against each other by an illusion of racial supremecy. So, while members of the working class are busy fighting to grasp anything that may distinguish them, even something as trivial as the color of their skin, the rich and famous are united in enjoying life and ensuring that they continue to enjoy life. Is it safe to say that our reality is fabricated by those in power?? Oh yeah, did anyone else hear that gas companies made a $36 billion profit in 2005 (up from $11 billion in 2004) I thought the American people were told that increased gas prices were a result of a shortage caused in part by Katrina. I didn't major in economics but I thought the law of supply and demand wouldn't allow for a $25 billion increase in profits...

I apologize for coming back from my leave of absence still droning on about priorities but it has to be done. My generation of African Americans has become too complacent with its status. We do not realize that we are just coming up...as recently as 50 years ago (I'm talking about our parents here) we were not given the opportunity to live so luxuriously. For real, we need to get it together and invest in something worthwhile. We can't keep laying up on our parents; the only reason they have given us what they have is because their parents couldn't do it for them. We can not become complacent. We have to continue in the tradition of making life better for each successive generation. I want to share a story: About two months ago I was running to class and was oblivious to anything going on in the lobby of the building I was in. As I got on the elevator, I noticed this old woman just as the doors were closing. She could not even stand without balancing herself on tables or whatever was around yet she was dusting the wood in the lobby. She was well past retirement age but obviously she had to work because somebody in her family still relied on her. My point in telling this story is that our ancestors understood what was important in life. These people worked hard for something they knew they would probably never benefit from but they did it for us. We have to continue the tradition

"I know I can't afford to stop for a moment, that it's too soon to forget" -Mos Def

Since I've entered my end of the semester crunch time, I've been on the train at all hours of the night trying to get home from school. No matter how late I've been on the train, there's always some middle schoolers on it too. The fact that they're hanging out with their friends on a school night is a direct indication of what the school system is not doing. Did you know that in the last two to three years at least 300 D.C. public school teachers were laid off?? I don't know how to fix the school system's problems but I'm guessing that having a sufficient amount of teachers is a major part of it. And...in order to keep teachers you have to pay them. Did you know that the D.C. Council rejected a proposition to take $75 million from the stadium project and give it to D.C. schools and libraries?? Did you know that 33 percent of D.C. residents are functionally illiterate?? This is a classic example of misplaced priorities.

Okay, I'm going to attempt a more personal entry once again (I hope I don't bore everybody to death this time around). Last spring, I was hanging out with a group of about 15 people in which I was one of two persons of color. As our time together was coming to an end, one of the group members began quoting Dave Chappelle. He got to a line that contained the word, n***a...you can imagine the tightness in my chest while I waited to hear if he would say it. I'm not going to go into the rest but let's just say the night ended and I was not a happy camper. My point in recounting this story is to remind everybody to simply think before they open their mouths. It's one of those principles we're taught early on by our parents; obviously some people need a refresher course. The world would be a much better place if people were more sensitive towards others. And to all of my many extremely talented friends who have the potential to be in the public eye, always think about the consequences of your actions. You never know who your audience will be so it's better to keep sensitive topics confined within a safe space. Going back to the Chappelle example, it is all fun and games until something like what happened to me happens.

In the spirit of those lost in the Paris Riots
I can't even take credit for this theory so I'm going to go ahead and say that this is taken from Mumia Abu-Jamal's book We Want Freedom. Stripped down to basics, he says that most riots are an attempt for a group of people to either gain or maintain social status. In history, most riots initiated by Caucasians were meant to insure their status as the dominant race. Most riots initiated by those of African descent were meant to fight oppressive standards of living (this is happening in Paris as I write this). Mumia Abu-Jamal argues that the media has given the word "riot" a negative connotation and connected it with people of color. He argues that the word "Resistance" should be used instead. I agree. I think a clear distinction should be made between riot and resistance. If people are involved in nonsensical violence or violence used to oppress a group of people, it should be referred to as a riot. If people subjected to subhuman standards of living decide to force an enactment of equality, this should be considered a resistance. Can you condemn people for demanding to be treated justly?? How is this something to be viewed in a negative light??

About three days ago in the Washington Post, I read that FEMA is cutting funds to Katrina victims. The agency wants evacuees to start looking for permanent housing. It claims that spending the holidays in homes instead of hotel rooms will be more in the spirit of the season. Oh yeah, it also mentioned as sort of an afterthought that FEMA is spending too much money trying to house the evacuees. We need that money to fund wars against Saddam Heisen, Bin Laden, or whoever we're looking for this week. Shouldn't we be trying to help our countrymates before we go and destroy foreign towns and then pay to rebuild them. And what is with all the foreign children dying?? I'm sure they're insurgants too, right??

I keep hearing that America is not ready for a female president and I can't help but wonder what makes this statement true. Since America is supposed to be so progressive, it seems like we should be trying to decide if we're ready for a homosexual president. Maybe I'm asking too much from a country that can't decide how it feels about a woman's right to choose. Anyway, so we're not ready for a female president. I beg to differ. As much as I hate the fact that Condi Rice is on the wrong team, I cannot deny that she is a powerful woman. She has visited more countries during her time in office than her male counterparts and she has been accepted in unexpected places (i.e. countries that don't believe women should hold any type of power). She's getting her job done and getting it done well. If a woman like Rice was president, I guess America wouldn't be ready for her because she'd actually accomplish something.